Divorce is rated as the second most stressful life event that a person can go through according to the Holmes & Rahe Social Readjustment Rating Scale, second only to the death of a spouse or child. In a situation in which tensions are at a peak and emotions are running high, it may seem impossible to be able to put the past behind and move forward as friends with your ex. Yet according to Bill Ferguson, a psychologist for whom divorce is a specialty, and whose work has been featured on Oprah and theWall Street Journal, it's an attainable possibility for anyone who tries.
The most important thing to remember is that how you interact with the other person determines what kind of divorce you're going to have. “You can either act in a way that ends conflict, heals your relationship, and forwards cooperation or you can act in a way that creates more pain and suffering,” according to Ferguson. It's no secret that during divorce, pain and suffering is usually the norm.
Keeping things calm and as friendly as possible is important in any divorce, but crucial if you have children and are facing decisions about custody. And according to USA Today, more couples than ever are “opting for a friendly divorce, whether through mediation, collaboration, or even do-it-yourself kits. And the majority of couples choosing friendly divorces are those with children.” This could be due to the fact that many facing divorce today saw the far messier divorces of their parents, and have decided to take a different route.
If you or someone you know is facing divorce, don't go through it alone. Contact a competent and experienced Illinois divorce attorney today.